Have I ever mentioned my secret desire? No? Well it would have something to do with me having a house full of beautiful plants, with a green landscape out my front door and a little vegetable garden in back. Flowers would bloom everywhere, and the herbs would perfume the walkways.
Have I ever mentioned my black thumb? Yes? I thought I probably had. The flora and fauna of the earth is a complete mystery to me. I have killed pretty much every plant ever given to me, including two cacti and mint (which apparently is unkillable). The only thing have ever managed to truly help thrive were these philodendrons in our backyard in San Antonio. They were huge; so huge that Olivia used to hide in them. I would run out and cover them with sheets in the winter freezes. It was some kind of love affair. I think i was just so grateful to have a plant that loved me back.
This got me thinking about the things we cannot do and how we overcome them. I got to thinking about how so many of my talents have grown over the past few years. They grew because I practiced. I persevered. I just assumed they were skills I could conquer so I kept working at them, kind of how children keep putting pegs in the hole.
Then I thought of gardening and my obvious hesitation with this skill. I am not a natural gardener. It takes patience and delicacy, two things at which I really do not excel. I love photography because you have to react quickly; the entire process for me is a blur of fast movements. Get in, get out. Otherwise you lose your light, the subject moves, etc. With cooking you have to add things at just the right time. ingredients must me positioned and ready. With gardening, one must prepare seasons ahead of time. Plans have to be laid out. One must be patient for the fruits of their labors. That is something that is excruciatingly hard for me.
So maybe the time is upon me to climb the mountain that is gardening. Tackle the mud-pit of a yard. Not be afraid of planing the wrong thing in the wrong place. Because we all underexposed a photo or two along the way.
